Funky Boy

“Psychologists call it “learned helplessness” when a person believes, as I did during my youth, that the choices I made had no effect on the outcomes in my life.” JD Vance, Hillbilly Elegy I read that on Facebook today. I haven't read the book and it doesn't sound like one I might like so I probably won't. It's a good quote though. It is by the guy who called Trump an idiot who is probably the next vice president. Somebody called me a victim. I didn't respond. The point? I don't think I had one. Every dumb decision I made I made by myself. I worked a job I hated because I wasn't man enough to change things. I was fat and unhealthy because I hung around with dumb asses who did the same thing. Drunks shouldn't spend Saturday night with a drunk. I sat on my ass and waited for my ship to come in while telling you there was no damn ship. Nobody made my choices. My parents were tough who did their best. I am trying to get my life better after years of living a...

I've been thinking. I don't know what's going on in the world. There's a lot of horrible things going on.  Our last president is in big trouble. The guy there now is run of the mill.  Bill Clinton is 77 and hasn't been president for over 21 years, and he's still younger than Trump and Biden. We got wars we didn't start. What's next? We got people (wankers) who spend more time blaming everybody instead of figuring how what's next. You know the type. They think that's their job. None of them are happy people. The McRib is coming back, like I need to eat more garbage. I will eat those 3x times a day. Who the hell puts pickles on ribs? I got people who think I'm too black, too white, and too funky. I can't change the world or how I look. I don't think I'm funky enough. Time to up the Funk. I don't dance or sing but that sure as hell doesn't stop me.  I was fat but I started walking a few years ago and now I look good. I did be...

There are two kinds of people. People who talk shit and people who get shit done. Don't talk about shit unless you are getting shit done So I ran across this one guy who hates everything. If you saw his posts, he shits on everything. Does he do shit? No but he talks shit and wipes it on whoever he disagrees. He’s a churchie but you can’t really tell. He self-identifies as churchie but he's just a bullshitter who doesn't know it. He’s more of a wanker who posts holy roller shit once in a while but mostly he bitches about life and politics.  America is broken but talking shit doesn’t do shit. That’s just wanking when you were wishing you were in love. You want a better life? Get off your ass instead of complaining about your life. You want the world to change? Stop your moaning and get your ass making a difference. If you get a sliver while chopping wood to build a house, man up. Lick that wound and just keep building.  I watch the MAGA people. They are just like whatever is ...

I'm going to call the wankers out. Sanctimonious each of them. You called bullshit when somebody says they are praying for people killed in Texas. Instead, they post a list of schools attacked and thinks that makes a damn bit of difference. I don't know if prayers make a difference but the wankers who shit on them with lists of schools are wankers. They are sitting in a corner, pulling on their tool. Social media bullshit. Shit, if the people who are saying they are praying are actually praying (I think most are lying smug bastards), good on them. Does it make a difference? How the hell should I know but at least are doing something with two hands.  The copy paste crap - the wankers only need one hand for that. Meanwhile, what the hell? Who needs a Daniel Defense DDM4 Rifle to protect their house from thieves? Is that what farmers use to scare away wolves? A hell of lot of hypocrites, bullshit artists and gun salesmen are giving each other a tug this week.

As many of my two readers know, I live in Brooklyn. I'm not in New York right now. I'm in Denver, hundreds of miles from that wanker who shot up my neighbors. I travel for my job and this week I'm in Colorado.  By the time you read this anything I say is old news.  I arrived here Sunday night and am teaching Monday-Thursday. I'll be home Thursday night. I am safe.

I was reading about James Stachowiak on Facebook. I looked him up. A wanker. No, I didn't find any pictures of him with his hands down his pants. The more I read about him, the more I guessed he probably tried and didn't find anything to grab onto, but who knows? Is he a member of the Daily Stormtrooper, aka, "Storm the Pooper," the YMCA of the alt-right? I wouldn't be surprised. Anything he had, he broke off rubbing it against some inanimate object when he was 13. Tiny, delicate things are prone to break. He's one of those guys who thinks he's better than Jews. He's not. Are Jews better than him? As character goes, most of the time. His daddy it looks like was smart. Even joined MENSA . Junior must have felt inadequate, having a small brain as well as small other body parts. It is funny reading his dad's obit. He sounds like a decent man. Little Jimmy must be in snits knowing his dad worshiped the world's most famous Jew. Here is...

You got it, you lazy asses. I put in the time and came out ejukated. While you were bitching about the world, I got it done.  You were pissing over who's the president and I was moving forward.  You were wanking and I was graduating from the fine City University of New York.  I have a degree in history. I am the first one in the Funky Family to get a damn degree.  I was going to be a teacher. Hell, teaching I found is easy if you know your shit. I changed my mind when I went to a job fair and found out what corporate trainers make. They do OK but what made the difference was my background in construction. They like that I can figure things out and can talk with trade guys. This one company loved that and hired me to train their sales and customer service people. I have to fly all over the place and do my thing. I explain how a screwdriver works. No shit. There are lots of screwdrivers so that's not as dumb ass as it sounds. It turns out I can live where...

It sounds too good to be true. You know fatsos who do this. You want coffee but you are fat so you add sweetener. Are you still fat? I'm not a nutritionist. All I can tell you is what you already know. Most of you fatsos are fat because your diet is shit and you are a lazy bastard. Artificial Sweeteners Don't Help People Lose Weight, Review Finds That article is on NPR. Don't like NPR but are still fat? Shut up. Anything you'll say is bullshit. If you have a real issue that causes your weight problem, I don't mean you. I'm talking about the people out there who piss and moan about being fat who could do something. If you want to lose weight, get your ass out there. Walk. Stop with the snacks. I know people who can't give up snacks and are fat asses. They are wusses. I know one guy who lost as much as I did who can't give up snacks. That dumbass uses supplements. His ass is addicted to sweets. He gained every ounce back.

Hell, I don't know if it was five years ago. When was it that I realize my ass was fat? Every fatty knows this. I wasn't always fat. I watched too much damn television and drank a hell of a lot of beer. I ate at shit restaurants. I worked in construction doing any damn thing they asked. I had to get up early to get to the job. My tools would get stolen. Anyway, I got my ass in shape by walking and not eating as much shit. It took me a few years to lose 50 pounds. I walk everywhere. No damn beer anymore. I quit all the bad shit like cigars and dessert. I started school too. So I am graduating with a degree in high school education which is funny because I lived with just a high school diploma until now. I thought I was going to be a teacher but I don't like kids like I thought. I went to a job fair and now I have interviews going at several companies. I will make more money than I ever made. It isn't that I will be rich but if you ever lived hand to mo...

Mooning the Prophet I'm not French. Some French people piss me off. But I sure as hell won't kiss ISIS just because they murdered a lot of Frenchies. It is no secret that ISIS is masturbating in front of pictures of Mohammed. They have to because thy know they won't be fucking any virgins in the Promised Land.  I have some churchie friends. Half are nutjobs who hate Barack Obama and are paranoid freaks. You know what they won't do? Bomb a damn stadium. They have their crazies but not a whole group of them. Even the incestuous Westboro Bapatist Church, the damn fools they are, won't do it. They shout like the group of assholes they are but they won't kill anyone. I don't what France should do. They should gear up and beat the living shit out of the next bastard the who tries to do this bullshit. The damn atheists there have more trouble with religion than America has. My ass isn't in the picture. I'm too busy shitting on a Kora...

I'm no theologian. Anybody who knows me anywhere knows I think a lot of church people are full of shit. OK. That's a little over the top because I know some churchies who seem like regular people. They seem like they do what they should be doing and don't pretend to be perfect. I respect those. Some talk to damn much about shit they hate so those people are full of crap. The other ones bitch about what other believe and they are full of shit too. Can't get a straight answer out of them. Facebook is full of this. Then there are the bastards who want me to read a book whenever I ask them a question. What hell am I, a librarian? The show-offs are out there, "Look at me, I'm a holy roller." These fools brag about any damn thing they do. Keep your joy in your pants, would you? None of these freaks are as bad the Scientologists, though. I know, I know, John Travolta and Tom Cruise are Scientologists. Who cares? They are rich and famous. Scientologists ...

Like hell am I hoping to see one of these insects crawling on my ass.  

Brooklyn Sunrise This morning I walked over six miles. I started at around 5:30 and saw the sunrise. I didn't take that picture but I see that lots of mornings. I came home had some coffee and toast even read the newspaper. I don't have class. I don't have to work. I don't feel like sleeping. I don't know what I'll do today. I will read a little bit. I'm not taking any classes this summer. I was going to but changed my mind.  I will catch up on Facebook even though I hardly do anything there. You can friend me if you want.  https://www.facebook.com/funkyin.brooklyn I am not used to days off. I am not used to a real jobs with benefits like days off.  My journey is not complicated to explain. A few years ago, I looked at my life and didn't like what I saw. I was working hard doing odd jobs in construction at all hours, whenever I got the call. I was overweight and tired all the time. I had no future because I never took any classe...

I feel like Ralph Kramden only I am looking more like Ed Norton.

I'm a fat guy. I was a fat guy. I was a fat guy who worked so hard I was a skinny fat guy. Not really skinny. Just not as fat as other fatsos. I ate junk. Burgers, pizza, sub sandwiches (Subway is full of bullshit. My subs were almost as bad as McDonald's.) I worked my ass off pulling lumber. I got older and I started getting hurt on the job and was gaining my ass back fast. I started walking. Actually I started eating less food and was losing a little weight. No diets like only carbs. Hell no. I love carbs. I love protein too. Damn, give me a steak. This guy David Dane lost a helluvalotta weight by not doing any fancy bullshit diet so I thought I would try. It was no big deal. I just always left the meal a little hungry but not too much. I tried skipping meals and eating really tiny meals but I'm not a damn bird. I lost weight and still felt fat. Dane isn't really trying all that hard anymore and gained it all back because he still eats sugary shit . I don't. ...

Don't be a lemming. Turn off the  stupid talk radio. You just sound like an idiot spouting off their bitchiness. You follow these guys like some stupid lemming off of a cliff. Don't be asshole about cramming your bitching down my throat. You think the president made your life suck. So the president kicked your ass and so you are bending over like a prison wuss letting him run your life?  Fix your life. Don't blame Obama, Bush or bin Laden. Bush isn't president, Obama hasn't been one that long, and bin Laden is dead. Besides, your life probably sucked before Reagan was in office. Wanker. Get a job. Sitting on your ass reading my damn blog? What a wanker. Get a better job. A stupid friend hates his job but is too stupid to look for another one. What a wanker. Get a second job. Yeah, that sucks, but so is being broke. Go to school. I am doing this while working. Gotta pay for school. Get your degree. Of course your job is shit. Mine is too. No degree...

I met Alberto. He used to a carpenter/handyman in Miami who moved up here in 2005 when his wife died. He is 74 and was a Cuban refugee in the early 1980s. I thought I would be the oldest in my classes and the only one who worked with his hands. This guy came here illegally on a boat, got refugee status and now is a citizen. He couldn't read Spanish when he got here, and now knows English. Now he wants to get a degree. He doesn't care what in. He just wants his grandkids to know they can do it if he can. I got to respect that. I really do. 

I'm looking around. I always do. People are bitter, bitchy, moaning, blaming everyone else for their miserable lives. They are miserable because improving their life takes risk, and risk scares them to death. So they choose to be bitter instead of happy. They yell about free they are but wear self-installed handcuffs thicker than Grant's Tomb. They howl about I need religion and lived scared. What's your politics or religion done for you? They whine about how religion is what causes all the unhappiness but how happy has their atheism made you? The Facebook politicians and bar stall economists are just as bad. They know what's wrong with this country but prefer to tell me than to get involved. No one really gives a shit that says they do. Well, some really do, but they never say anything about. They are too happy making a difference in their lives and the world.

I'm sitting in a cubicle at school looking up stuff. The kiddies are bopping to some Taylor Swift crap. Why not real music? Parliament - Give Up the Funk

College starts up soon. Old man on campus. Snow is about to hit (again). The NBA can't find its ass. Shit going on with wannabe protesters in Manhattan. Damn kids are fighting about money, but when I was a kid, people fought for human rights. Thanksgiving was great. Lari and Em, my crazy cousins, crammed 15 of us at one table. Took a long table that sits eight, popped on a board, covered it with a thick tablecloth, and we had it all. My cousins from Michigan showed up, Indiana and even the Californians. 20 over all, but not everyone was around for dinner. Which brings me to the real question: what the hell are sweet potato balls? Yeah, my ass is bigger, for those of you who care. I ate. I was lazy. Went out today and walked three miles. Damn nice day.